Sunday, June 11, 2006

Love and Other Indoor Sports

Man-o-mine shared an epiphany he had with me last night.

He said, "You know, I've thought about it and I think you must love me more than I love you."

At the time, I thought he was just playing around and teasing me. This led me to ask why he thinks that, of course.

"Because you accept me for who I am. Even my insecurities. You accept me yet I am always trying to change something about you. How do you stand it?"

I really had not thought of love like that. I mean I try to show the kids unconditional love. I show my friends unconditional love. But I hadn't thought of my marraige as unconditional. There are definately things he does that make me angry. We occasionally hurt each others feelings but that's because we do not pussy foot around issues. We really call each other on assholeness and bitchiness. Most of the time, like 99%,we get along like peas in a pod.

The more I have thought about what he said the more I realized that he had a point though. When I fight with man-o-mine it is about being understood, not being right. When he is fighting with me it is to change something. Change my mind, change of heart, or changing the course, change is the key to his arguments.

I wonder if this is the difference between men an women, or if man-o-mine is on to something.

3 Comments:

Blogger Rave said...

Ah Ha! You've just entered the Twilight Zone....(que weird music)

Men say women try to change them. I don't think that's true, most of the time.
When women argue, it is to be understood. And I know from my arguments with Hubby, he wants to *change* what I think.

But it is a good point. I had never thought of it that way.
Does it mean that one person's way of loving is 'more' than another? I don't think so. I think it is just different wiring.

Men feel the need to change and control their environments. Women want to understand the environment they are in.
Just two sides of the same coin.

11:15 PM  
Blogger Doug said...

Wymin need changin,
Men are fine!

1:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!

12:07 AM  

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